Till you’ve been there

Pregnancy is really weird. Weirder than I ever thought possible. You hear a lot from pregnant women, but you really don’t know till you’ve been there. I used to hate hearing that when we were TTC. It hurt my feelings and I resented it. “Till you’ve been there.” Well it must be freaking nice to be there! WISH I WAS! As much as it shames me to say, they were right. Pregnancy isn’t something you can explain. You just have to experience it. And that experience goes one day at a time.
I thought I’d be different. I though because we had to wait so long, because we had a loss I’d be better. I wouldn’t complain. HA! When your body takes over, you have no control. I don’t mean to complain, but GEEZE this is weird! I am so grateful, so unbelievably grateful. I haven’t fully wrapped my mind around the fact this baby is really mine yet, but when you wake up daily feeling like you’ve been hit by a truck and you walk around sick, it’s kinda hard not to whine just a little. You’re worn out. You feel totally different and you don’t know what to do or how to fix it.
Another one of mine was “Who on Earth in their right mind doesn’t take their prenatal?? It’s one pill! Come on!” Um. Hi. I’m Lauryn and I didn’t take my pills more than 5 or 6 times in the first 9 weeks I was pregnant. I couldn’t! They made me SO sick and honestly it wasn’t one more think I wanted to put inside me to make everything worse. Thank GOD for gummy prenatals! Ran was so against them at first. Too much sugar, too much this, too much that. ‘Dag gum it- if you want me to take the vitamins, get me the dang gummies!’ And he did. And they are wonderful. And they don’t make me sick! Hooray! Yay for prenatals fit for a child! 😀
Ooh ooh! Or how about “I’m going to only eat organic healthy food when I get pregnant. No more junk! Only the best for my baby! It does’t have a choice what it eats, it’s up to me to make it good!” Again, HA! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Bwhahahaha! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! The first 2 weeks I after I found out I was pregnant I only ate vegetables and fruit and nuts and yogurt. And then one day Ran packed me some meat, and I almost lost my lunch right there on the table. Then I stopped eating the vegetables. Then the fruit. There was 2 whole days where all I had to eat was rice chips. I was starving but everything sounded awful. Then I ate some Pringles and the sky opened up and the angels sang! Salt! Salt helps the nausea! Now it’s Cheddar and Sour Cream Ruffles and sweet tea. Do you know what I ate today? Fries on 2 separate occasions (I threw up one order of them in the parking lot not 5 mins after I ate them) and pizza. I fed my kid fries and pizza. Yep. But you know what, I took my dang prenatals!

I guess my point is, there is no sense in the stress of what other people do when they are pregnant. Or when they have kids for that matter. I’m pretty sure we’re all just doing our best to survive it the best we can.  No 2 pregnancies are alike and I’ve been dang lucky with this one. You adapt to what cards you’re dealt. I say a lot about what I’m going to do with this baby once it’s born and what I’ll never do as a parent, but I’m learning, slowly but surely, I won’t know until I’ve been there.

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