On your due date

Today is the day. The day you were officially supposed to be born. (You obviously had other plans as usual.) It’s a day I never thought I’d see. We made it! We did it! 40 weeks and soon we’ll have you! I wanted to do special things today, to make memories and create moments. Really we just relaxed. No stress, no pressure. It was wonderful. I woke up in the best mood with plenty of energy and feeling great. I knew when I got out of bed today was not your day to be born. That’s okay. It really is. I want to hold you and kiss you but I’m trying to cherish every moment that it’s just you and me, while you’re still my little secret to keep and I don’t have to share you with anyone.
Our doula came by this morning to chat and talk to us about your labor and feeding you. After that Daddy and I went and ate lunch at the same place we ate lunch the day we found out you were really on your way. You love Japanese food. We’ve been to Yume more in the last 9 months than I’ve been to any restaurant in years I’m sure. The owner knows what to bring me to drink and to eat without even asking. They’re very excited to meet you.
This afternoon our precious Rebecca came over to photograph us in your room. It meant so much to me to capture these last hours before we bring you home. Our lives and our world as we know it is about to change. I wanted to show what we looked like in these last days, while we’re still Lauryn and Ran. While we’re making the transition into Mom and Dad. We are different people than we were a few short months ago. I am learning to let go and trust the plan rather than trying to control it. It’s a lesson in flexibility and patience. A lesson in not always being afraid all the time. Fear clouds joy and when it comes to you, I’ll always choose joy. Thank you for giving me these last 40 weeks, to learn, to grow, to change. Thank you, my sweet boy, for making me a mother. ❤

40 weeks 1 40 weeks 2 PicMonkey Collage3 PicMonkey Collage5

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